Putting me first
by 3murphytoddlers
Summary: Aria finally puts herself first. This is my take on what should happen with Aria after Spencer is shot.


**Let me start off by saying that I'm actually a huge Ezria fan! However a friend and I got into a discussion about all the things that both he and she have done over the relationship and realized that if this was the "real" world and Aria was our friend we would be telling her to ditch him that he's no good for her. Also as far as I can remember (I got bored in later seasons and skipped around so it's possible I missed something however I don't think so.) as much as they tried to make Jason this creepy guy they never could furnish much actual proof that he was.**

I hate hospitals! Every-time I've been in one in the last few years it's because one of the people I love is hurt. I'll never understand what we did to deserve this. I mean Spence was shot! She's in surgery now who knows if she'll make it. Then to top it off I can't get ahold of Ezra right now. No real surprise there.

"Hey Ali did you happen to call Jason and let him know what was going on?"

"No Aria I wasn't sure if he'd even come." Of course she would say that. I really get that they dont' have the best relationship. However Jason is really trying to make it up to her for not being there. I guess only time will tell and frankly their relationship isn't really my business.

"Ok I can do it. I really think he should be here."

 _"Hey Jason you need to get to the hospital ASAP. Spenser has been shot." "On my way." "Great thank-you" "Hey don't thank me she's my sister." "See you soon." I didn't have the heart to tell him that technically she was his cousin. That's something that we'll cross later._

"Does anybody want anything? Ali? Are you hungry?" That's our Emily. Always taking care of Ali before herself. The girls responded but frankly I've got too much on my mind to really pay much attention. I'm not handling things especially well right now. Ever since I had to exchange those tickets to Italy I've just been floating. Fact is I knew that even if Nicole wasn't found that I couldn't marry Ezra. I mean I know everyone says that we're made for each other and that may have been true at one point. However it's not now. I know people will say I'll regret not giving him a chance when he gets back. I won't tho. It's not even the issue of him leaving me at home waiting for him when he didn't even get on the plane. Or him not responding to any message I've sent since we got here to the hospital. With him I've always been second place. First the book and then Nicole.

From: Jason

Hey I'm here what floor are you guys on?

From: Me

5th the surgical center. Just wait down there tho I'll meet you.

"I'm going to go get something to eat. All this stress is making me hungry. Text me if you want me to bring anything up."

"Jason." I know technically it's not appropriate but I hug him anyway.

"Hey are you ok?

"Physically yes. Jury is still out on my emotional state tho."

"Well you know I'm here if you need anything." Despite what the girls think Jason has always been so sweet.

"I might just take you up on that. First though I have news. Not really sure how your going to take it." He gave me that oh no what now look. "It's not actually as bad as you might think. Let's get some food and I'll tell you all about it."

"I just want some coffee. Being back here reminds me why I stay away for long periods."

"Oh yeah I get that. I'm the same way. For me it's the girls who keep me coming back here." He just smiles that smile that tells me to continue. "Anyway Spencer is alive for the moment. She was shot in the abdomen. She's in surgery now. They say it's too soon to tell however based on when Ezra got shot I'm thinking she'll be ok. She's a fighter."

"And the other news?" Of course he won't de-stress until she's fully recovered and all this is behind us.

"It looks like we were way off on our assumption about Noel being Mary's baby. Which now that i think about it makes sense because a judge wouldn't preside over an adoption that he was apart of. According to Mary Spencer is her daughter. So technically speaking she's not your sister but your cousin. I'm sorry. I know you must feel like your loosing a sister instead of gaining a cousin."

"You know me so well. At least now we know that she's not the one who's been causing all this trouble."

"About that. Spencer was shot by Jenna. Her and Noel lured us to an abandon house to try and kill us all. Noel's dead. Jenna just disappeared. She was going in for the kill shot with Spencer and Mary knocked her out of the way. We lost track of her then."

"Life is never dull with you girls is it? I'd ask if your ok but that seems like an oxymoron considering the circumstances."

"I'm still trying to catch my breath with all of it. I mean with everything going on in my own personal life, to what my friends are going threw, to this. My head is still spinning."

"All things considered the fact that your all still standing just shows how strong you are. What about Ezra? I'm surprised he's not here with you."

"I was hoping to have a bit more time to compose my thoughts about all of that. I guess lets start with the facts and then I'll tell you what I've decided. I talked to him yesterday and he said he was going to come home. That he forgave me for deleting the call from Nicole. He knew I was just trying to spare him having to go threw loosing her again. Anyway I waited at the apartment like he asked and he never showed. I started getting worried and called the airline but of course like with everything they couldn't tell me anything at all. Then I turn on the news and wouldn't you know there he was. The Special Op's team did another search to satisfy the family of the missing aid workers. Nicole was found. Alive. They showed her running out and into his arms."

"Wow. I'm not really sure if saying I'm sorry is appropriate or not."

"It's fine. I know what you mean by it. Besides her being found alive doesn't change anything. I've been doing alot of thinking and soul searching the past few days and I've made some decisions."

"Like what?"

"First I'm not going to marry Ezra. I realize now that I'm not willing to be second place. Which is how it's always been. I mean we were supposed to fly to Italy and get married the day he left for Columbia. If he wanted to marry me then he wouldn't' have gone. I get needing closure but not at the expense of your current relationship."

"Aria he loves you."

"Be that as it may I'm not willing to be second fiddle to whatever he decides is more important. That brings me to the second thing. I can't remember a time when I was single for more then a few weeks. In High School, College and even when I went to work. I need to take some time and just figure out me. So I was wondering. After the book tour and all the obligations surrounding that are over do you still have a spot for me with your charity?"

"After I get the financial end taken care of your more then welcome to join me. I wont' put any pressure on you to stay longer then you want or to be with me or any of that. I've learned over the years that some things are worth the wait."

"Jason you are just too good too me. Especially after all I've put you threw."

"Hey don't worry about any of that. I get it. If nothing else it was good you did it the way you did. That way you'll never wonder what you could be giving up. If down the road things do work out for us then great but if not that's fine too."

"Thanks." He really was too understanding. "So any word from your accountant friend? How long do you think it will take? And is the money just gone either way?" I'm in desperate need of a project. Thinking right now is just too much.

"I haven't heard much. There's alot to go threw. It could be anywhere from a few weeks to a year or more. In the meantime I've got some plans to make. I'm thinking about opening a separate account for the non-profit. Maybe I can do some fundraisers, get some sponsors and what not. Either way I need to speak to an attorney and figure out what I can and can't do in the mean time."

"Well I'll do what I can. I'm really good at planning. I've also made some contracts with some people who might be interested in this kind of thing. Another plus is that if the book does well I'll be able to pay my own way and not rely on the charities money."

"Let's not worry about that tonight. I'll pay for you myself if I have too. However right now we both have other things to take care of."

"Your right of course. Let's go up and see if there's an update on Spence. Just do me a favor? I haven't told the girls any of what I told you about me and Ezra. Can you keep that to yourself?"

"Of course I can. It's not mine to share. Ready?" I don't know if Jason senses my need for a connection right now or if he needs it himself but we walk up to where the girls are with his arm around my shoulders and my arm around his waist.


End file.
